Stories

I believe in the power of family stories.  That is a lot of why I write this blog, because I want to write the down the adventures and stories that happen before I forget them.  So that I can look back, so that my children can look back.

Tonight, I was putting Willow to bed. She wanted a story.  What she wanted was one of the imaginative stories her father tells her at bedtime.  He has characters and everything.  I am not good at making up stories like that.  And she knows this, so we have started a tradition that I tell her stories of my past.  I have told her the story of how her dad and I met.  Tonight, I told her about my Grammie and how she used to have a metal tin of peanuts that she would use to feed squirrels in her back yard. It was something that made me feel good--to relive something from my past, to make her live again.  To share and hope that some day my child will share that story with others.

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Michael had to write an essay about a personal hero.  It is hard to see his work--he is protective of it and doesn't really let us look at his homework.  (I figure as long as he is getting good grades, its okay)  I did inquire, like I usually do, and he let me know it was going to be about his Grandpa Michael.  I let Chewy know it was going to be about his father.  A figure that Michael only knows about through stories that Chewy has told him...because he died before Michael was born.  Chewy was able to find the essay (I think the rough draft).  He writes some stories that about him and then explains the adversity in his Grandfathers life, how there were certain things he wanted to do, but was not able to do.  He concludes with:

"It taught me that there are always things there to stop you from getting to your goal (and you can't let them). It taught me that a real hero doesn't even have to be well known or recognized. A real hero is a someone who means something to you. They stand as a symbol for what is right and what you can do. Most of all my Grandfather's story is what encourages me to do the kind of things he dreamed of, to go the distance he went, and to leave a mark for the good of society where he couldn't. My Grandfather is my greatest hero. May he rest in peace."

I guess one never knows where those stories can lead.

Age(less)

She touches her hands.  She remarks on how different they are from her own.  The generous woman lets her touch her skin.  She says she is eighty-one years old.  (She doesn't look it...very spry)

I am reminded of other hands and other times when I was the young girl looking at the future.

Now I am the future-middle.  The woman asks her how old her mom is.  She remarks I am almost half her age.

As we drive home I think how the year is moving toward spring.  How April is such an important month for me (for her).  How time works its way through the trees we drive past...the snow still on the ground, chill still in the air.

Age and time.  My daughter and my mother.  And this woman who generously spent time with my daughter today and taught me an important lesson in time.

Gilligan's Island vs. Frozen; Universal Monsters vs Riff Trax

Both kids have been obsessed lately with the above mentioned subjects.  Living vicariously through your kids can mean you have the nostalgia factor going for Gilligan's Island and the Universal Monsters.

Yesterday, Willow woke up sick.  I stayed home with my little sickie girl.  She was so listless and feeling awful...only Gilligan's Island would make her feel better.  We watched every single one on our DVR (that is eight of them...not all at once!)  I have a greater appreciation for this show as an adult...which surprised me actually.

When she felt a little better in the evening...it was the (almost) daily viewing of Frozen.  She loves this movie...she loves singing the songs and she is transfixed each time.  We snuggled up (me hoping not to get what virus she has) and watched it yet again.

Michael came home from school...and the atmosphere changed.  To Frankenstein's House!  It was time to watch Boris Karloff and Lon Chaney, Jr.  and I was brought back to my teenage years again.  I loved watching this with Michael!

And then there is Riff Trax.  Almost every day, Michael ends his evening with a Riff Trax short.  It is sometimes annoying how much he wants to watch them.  But most times--it is like a nice end to the day.

Coming up for Air

The last couple of weeks have flown by.  Work has been hectic and busy and stressful.  Life has been chaotic.  It has been COLD.

Lately, Willow has been having trouble sleeping.  Well, mainly getting to sleep.  She gets anxious and she worries about things.  Now, sometimes they are the typical almost six year old things--you know, monsters under the bed, it being to dark in her room, needing to have a glass of water.

Other times...her serious side smacks me across the head.  She has asked about death and dying.  She has worried about going on a boat tour and sinking (when we don't have any such adventure planned at all).  Last night she was worried that when she goes away to college, she won't be able to find her way back home.  Most of the time these worries turn out into interesting discussions.  Last night we talked about what she wants to be when she grows up (a teacher).  Luckily, we seem to have a handle on this and I am sure that as time goes on she will get back to being able to go to sleep without the anxiousness.  But that seriousness...it is nice to see this side of her, this thoughtful side.

Michael seems to be getting the hang of teenager-ness.  He is also being less prickly.  He has been spending more time interacting with Willow like he used to.  Last year, he was kinda hands off with everyone.  Now, he is spending time with her on his own and helping her with her homework.  He is starting to get back into being that big brother that he usually has been.

I miss not being with them as much during the work week...and weekend time is short.  Let's be honest...my kids are growing up!  (and I cannot wait for April vacation!)

Accomplishments

How they happen so quickly, and how we acknowledge at the time...and yet...no honorific, no plaque...not even a Facebook status....

So, here, on my blog I put them...so that are not totally lost.

• Willow has stopped sucking her thumb (well, she may do it at night, but that is a comfort thing, not sure if that can be stopped).  She did it without pressure from me.  She did it on her own.  She knew it was important to stop, we had talked to her.  And then she just stopped. 
• Willow also plunged herself into the water this past weekend--her head all the way down, holding her breath!  She did it two times and was very proud of herself!  She cannot wait to take more swimming lessons.
• Michael has been babysitting Willow with skill and perception.  It was nice to be able to celebrate Valentine's Day with a night out, realizing that Willow would be in capable hands.

Total Con 2014

Well, this year was one of the best times yet!  We got all the games we registered for (that usually doesn't happen!), no one was sick (we have had happen a few notable times) and Willow got to do her first round of Young Player games!

We tried a few things differently - we did not meet up one night at the hotel restaurant (too long of wait last year) and our friend John watched Willow for a couple hours (which was nice to have mom and dad be able to be in two separate games at the same time!)

Friday was got there just in time to pick up our registration and get right into our games!  Willow started off with her first ever game of Clay Wars:

I helped her to create Spikey - the poisoned spiked, six legged caterpillar like creature. Which she promptly lost with because she went off and attacked first...and everyone else attacked her creature!

But...she learned her lesson--and had great advice from her Master Gamer father---and ended up being one of the winners in Clay Wars!  She got a plaque and everything!  

Chewy also won many "Best Player" tickets in his games (he usually does), and Michael used the tickets to get a really cool Zombie board game.

I did a mix of games, including playing miniatures in the war against the Martians!

(We were able to destroy one of the Martians ships...but we lost the war...)

Michael had fun meeting up with various kids he has seen each year.  He played some role playing games and spent free time playing a lot of Smash Brothers and other video games.

This year they had someone selling gamer themed cupcakes and cookies.  I bought a dozen of them since Michael's birthday was on Friday.

Cthullu all cute and Yummy!

I feel this year I was able to really get to game more than a lot of other years and I liked the independence that it gives Michael each year.  I also liked that Willow was able to actually play some games this year and that Chewy was able to relax.  Now, getting a good night's sleep...not something that happened this year--but that wasn't too bad!  The company, the games, the food and the fun, was worth the few hours of sleep lost!

Sunday--just about ready to go to our last events!

Almost Fifteen (!)

This Friday, February 21st, he will be fifteen. As usual, the amazement at how time changes and slowly erases my small child into a young man. It has been a tough transition into high school.  There has been some definite teenage angst, teenage metabolism (no food is safe!) and general all around growing pains....but Fifteen!  Another year to learn and grow for all of us!  I am very proud of my teenager!

Batman Birthday Cake at Bertuccis.  (A weekend earlier because we will be at the gaming convention next weekend)

Report Cards, Summaries and Progress....

From a progress report at Willow's afterschool program.

Both kids report cards came this week.  Willow's report card was simple to decipher.  She is learning and except for not being able to remember her phone number and address...she is doing very well.  She can she is learning math, reading and all the other things a kindergartner is supposed to.  She is learning how to write stories and the concepts behind how letters turn into words.  She has gotten in trouble a couple of times because she doesn't always "listen", but otherwise she is doing very well with her transition into school.

Michael has had a bumpier ride transitioning into high school.  However, he did mainly get A's on his report card.  He pulled up his Honors Algebra, pulled down his Computer Animation class grades, but we hope that this year is the adjustment year and that his grades will reflect that.  Now that he has changed to the Academic Algebra class--he seems to be handling time management and homework better.  He is still adjusting to having two social skills/help classes each day--but his team has seen progress and everyone is on a learning curve when it comes to figuring out what makes Michael tick (everyone including Michael!).

Therapy is really going well for him, although very taxing for us all.  The therapist seems to be helping Michael deal with his frustrations and giving him alternatives.  We are also thinking some boxing classes might help him let go of some of his pent up energy/frustration/anxiousness.


I am proud of both my kids!

One more step closer...

Haven't tried a vacation in April in quite some time...

The Year So Far....

As the first month of the new year draws to a close, some stray observations...

• It is annoying to have a snow blower that doesn't work.  Yep. Hoping to get that fixed sometime soon.

• Chewy has been writing a sort-of homage/eulogy to our friend Paul and I find it interesting how this year anniversary has come and gone and our family is still coping with this loss.

• Kittens are damned cute.  (Which is good, because cat litter is damned smelly!)

• Michael seems to have gotten through his first ever mid-terms and pulled up his grades (A/Bs, probably a C in Honors Algebra) this term.  He seems to have an affinity to English that I never really knew he had.

• Lately, Willow has become obsessed with her hair.  Wanting to have it just right, having it in pony tails and pig tails.  Things I can do pretty ineptly.  Braids...I am not going there.  (But she did...at the hair cut place)

•  Michael is going to be 15 years old in less than a month.  I have gotten him personalized M&Ms and I am thinking of getting a picture of Batman and putting it on a cake for him.  (Adam West Batman, I think) Other than that, pretty low key--maybe have a couple of his friends over for pizza or movie or laser tag. 

• Michael's friends--I know he has them. I have never seen them.  Chewy has met them briefly.  But we have never actually met them.  They come over after school on Fridays and hang out for a bit.  I have heard them on the phone when Michael calls in to say he is home.  I know this sounds a bit like I am being a negligent parent here--but, frankly, with Michael's Aspergers and his usual loner attitude--friends are hard to come by, so, for some reason...this has worked for about 2 years.  (Maybe I will meet them soon!)

• Tonight, I realized how I have to change my perspective---literally.  I was teaching Willow how to peel carrots for dinner...when I remembered that she is left-handed.  It really just dawned on me why she was having a bit more trouble than I thought she would.  I had to switch her hands up...and remind myself of this newly acquired trait.

• Both children amaze and annoy me with their growing-ness.  Our house has a teen going to bed early at night; a kindergartner not wanting to go to bed at bed time.  Food that disappears regularly -- my stove top often has a pan with little bits of mac n cheese or canned pasta sitting on it.  Toys are everywhere, including the bathroom sink (we seem to be a salon--last weekend she used sticky notes to draw pictures and put them on the bathroom door...one said I "heart" CH...not sure what that meant).

• Already looking towards spring and a possible vacation in April....

Random Holiday Photos

"buckeyes" and birthday cake at work

Zoolights

Princesses in Tree

Michael assembling his Batman legos

Morning Time Again

Much needed sleep after a long and frustrating week....

The first one comes up to snuggle me--he is the one that is leaner and aggressive with his cuddles.  I pet him and he purrs and he snuggles in for a bit.

Then she comes, she is more playful with me and I rub her tummy and she rolls about on the bed.

For a bit, the two kittens rumble on our bed, between our legs.

A little later, older, wiser...and heavier cat comes in.  He is like an old friend, and I hold him close and rub his chin.

(Yes, they are basically all asking me to get up and feed them!  But, I am enjoying the cuddling and purring, the warmth of the bed and my husband next to me....)

Drifting up to add to this wonderfulness--I hear the boy and the girl.  Playing a video game.  And he is being gentle and thoughtful to her (so different from his gruff teenager exterior lately) and she is giggling.

I listen and feel and enjoy.

Ahhh...weekend morning.  Thank you.

Watching with New Eyes

Tonight it was me and her. And an old friend.

I did not expect to watch the whole movie...so long. I was not sure if she was going to be attentive through the whole thing.

We sat together under a blanket. She asked questions, but mostly she watched and listened.

I saw my old friend with not only fresh eyes, but with older ones. It has been a while since I have watched the whole movie all the way through.

I had tried to watch it with such enthusiasm with the boy when he was about her age. He liked it, but did not love it. He watched it, but not all the way through.

She watched and dazzled. We snuggled and had goose bumps. I told her that this was one of my favorite movies when I was a little girl. And she understood.

I watched the movie with mother's eyes. I thought of all the times I wished for a daughter to share this with...and I sat there amazed yet again with my good fortune to have her. And my old friend.

Snow Day Perfect Moment

Feeling a bit under the weather, I lay on the couch.  She is playing with her toys; he is playing a video game on the computer.  I drift off to sleep.  She comes up to me and explains the hair on her ponies and how she is arranging it.  I close my eyes again.  He points me to a part of the game he is working on and I look up to watch.  And I close my eyes again--warm and happy at the life and family around me.

(It did also help that we had a snow plow do most of our hard labor!!)

(Which is good, cuz oiur snowblower is broken and Chewy has Golfer's Elbow.)

Later, we have oreos and hot chocolate and watch a movie.

I love my family.

2013 Can Bite My Shiny Metal A**

I have not had a year as bad as 2013 was in quite some time.  It started last holiday season with Gall Bladder surgery and a family stomach bug, a death of a dear friend in January, lay-offs and general bad things.

Yes, there were some good times, especially this past spring and summer.

But it seemed that every time we thought things were getting better in our lives, that normalcy was finally going to reign, something else happened to turn our lives upside down.

We have finally had a re-boot and it seems this return to normalcy will take us to 2014.

Where I hope we find smooth sailing for a while.

Good bye, 2013.  For once, my bittersweet depression over leaving another year behind--is not so much.

Yeah, HOORAY for 2014!!!

Willow Goes to the Nutcracker

Originally the plan was for all of us to go to a simulcast of a Nutcracker movie.  It was cheaper than going to the theater, and we could be in a comfortable movie theater near home.

And then a snowstorm canceled the show.

People at work knew about this.  And that is how one of the lawyers got me an incredible birthday present.

She purchased two tickets to a matinee performance of the Boston Ballet Nutcracker so that I could take Willow.

It was a wonderful experience mother/daughter experience and I will treasure it forever.

The performances were wonderful, there were lots of little girls dressed up and the sets and everything was memorable.  The look on Willow's eyes after the curtain fell for intermission...the wonder and amazement.  It was so worth it.  It was so fun and so fulfilling--I almost don't feel bad that someone side-swiped my car in the parking garage!  [sigh]

I often feel that one of the most important things in life is to experience it.  Is to explore and enjoy it.  And this was one of those times.  (If you ever want to get me a gift--take me out, do something with me...I will treasure it!)

I bought her a new dress to go to the show.  This is her posing for the camera before we left.

The seats were perfect and we could see everything!  (Oh, and the person next to her complimented her on her dress)

Afterwards, we went out to eat, just the two of us.

By then, she was getting a little punchy--but I am so glad that someone asked if we wanted a picture taken. together.

The Christmas Post

I am definitely happy that this years holiday season has not been a repeat of last years!

Christmas did come quickly, it seemed. As did Hannukah (already so long ago gone!).

We had fun this season, and there is more fun to come this long weekend!

I have been a little less depressed this season than the last couple.  It could be because this year has been a rough one and we are only now seeing our way clear to a better New Year...maybe it is because this year HAD to be better than having my gall bladder out and being in the hospital and having a family stomach flu.  Maybe it is because I am a year wiser. (Nah!)

Nonetheless, the bittersweet of the season has not hit me like a wet blanket like it has the last few years.  I miss the people, I realize time seems to go ahead with or without me. I am trying to enjoy the moments and the moments in between.  (I am very zen this Christmas)

I liked this list I recently saw on Facebook for Rules for 2014.  I hope to try to abide by them this coming year.

As for Christmas Eve, Christmas and my Birthday--things went off very well and relaxing.  The kids got what they wanted, I was "surprised" by some gifts for my birthday.  I had a wonderfully funny and thoughtful gift from my son...and it was good.

Now, pies are done and turkey will be put into the oven.

MERRY CHRISTMAS to All.

Going out for a Birthday Dinner last night.

Getting ready to hand out presents last night.

New pjs and robe--new toy.

Lennier liked his toy too!

Santa's COMING!

New PJs!

Playing a new game!

Putting magic reindeer food out for the reindeer!

Ready for bed!  (Well, after coming down again for some egg nog to calm the nerves)

Stocking set up.

Looking at the toys Santa brought!

And chocolate!

Michael made sure to set his alarm at 5:30 a.m.

Huggling.

Quietly playing.

Going to a Brunch Sunday with the Uncle Will, Aunt Heather, Lorelei and Kirsten.

Cousins.