Thursday, September 28, 2017


A few nights ago...
                              She comes over to the edge of our bed (my side). She cannot sleep, she says...she always has troubles falling asleep at night, but for some reason the last few nights have been worse.  Finally, I ask in desperation, "Well, is it better for me to come to your room and sit with you, or just have you come in our bed?" She said "Please can I cuddle?".  

                              So, pushed to the far end of my bed, with an already immovable  asleep object on the other side (Hi there, Chewy!).  We laid down, and I held her close...and I brushed her hair with my hand.  She said "Will you promise me something?"  "Sure." "Please don't die until you are at least 100 years old, okay?!" It is late, she is beautiful and warm and so worried and mine.  I lie.  "Of course, hon.  I promise."   She falls asleep, as I lay there and wonder at life and everything.


This morning at the IEP meeting....

                              We are about to leave the productive and long meeting, he has already went into the car, waiting for us. One of the counselors asked if we heard the puppy story.  We had not.

                              This summer, he had the internship at the Rescue League.  He started there by shadowing the counselor (who volunteers there regularly).  At one point, the counselor was saying "Good girl!, etc." to a puppy while taking care of it.  Michael asked "Why are you talking to the puppy that way?  It doesn't understand human words!"  The counselor explained that especially shelter dogs do not get as much interaction as other dogs and this was a way for the dogs to receive some happiness.  Later on the day, when it was time to go, the counselor couldn't find him.  When he did, he found Michael in a room, sitting on the floor with three puppies climbing on him.  He was playing with them and saying "Good Girl!", then looking to make sure the appropriate gender of the next pup "Good...Boy!"

Sunday, September 24, 2017


Today is my mom's birthday.  Normally, the scramble to some how find a time and place to celebrate, to coordinate (especially since my brother's birthday is also this month)...normally the "hassle" of this would come into play (at least a little).  Well.  There is year, starts the years of knowing that there are no more birthdays, at least with her here.

It was quieter this year..and made me feel a little guilty that daily life can sometimes make these celebrations seem just mandatory intrusions into our busy lives.  I will be more mindful of this, or at least I will try, when other such celebrations occur.

Today, my brother and sister in law and my nieces came by this morning.  We had a breakfast together and had pancakes and scambled eggs and fruit and carrot cake.  (No freckle...not enough people like that special egg concoction that our Grandma and Mom made...perhaps another time...)

We had a pleasant morning.  Then we each lit a memorial candle, remembering her.  Michael remembered going to the movies with her (we saw The Hobbit and a couple other ones); Willow remembered when we unexpectedly dropped by to see her and how she smiled; Chewy remembered one of the first times he met her...and she gave him a head of lettuce to take back to his home; my nieces remembered going to visit her; my brother remembered a childhood memory of spending en evening with her while our dad was out; my SIL remembered visiting her in her apartment and going out to lunches with her; and I remembered her picking out presents for everyone out of the Kimbles magazine.

Memories are important and I am glad we were able to share them.  Memories keep the person alive.  So.  Happy Birthday, Mom.

Wednesday, September 13, 2017


The School Year has begun!

Willow is in Fourth Grade--which is a big transition grade.  Lots of homework, lots less recess and free time--cursive and typing, math and was not fun the last go 'round...lets see how mom and Willow do this year...I will be cursing homework at some point...that is a given.

But, she likes her teacher, and she is liking the rest of the classwork.

She is still having issues with math.  I am trying to help her memorize the multiplication tables.  Last night, there was an actual tender moment with her and Michael, where she asked him if math ever got better.  He actually gave her good advice and pointed out that sometimes it gets easier when the concepts click, and it is hard when you cannot understand it--but you will get it.  It was a nice moment of brotherly love and advice.

First day of school picture--as usual, my daughter shows her true colors--Not A Morning Person!

Her new obsession is her Kindle...somewhere there is breakfast...
Michael ready to go, yep!

Ready to go to school!

Meanwhile, Michael is going to Mass Bay.  He likes his professors and classes so far.  The big issue is trying to get the transportation working correctly.  This is his last venture through the special education system, as his previous school is providing transitioning service, which includes helping him navigate time management, campus life, goal setting, etc.  Now he will be starting to figure out what are his goals for the next few years and how does he want to achieve them.  We have his last IEP meeting in October...and then, next year...we will be on our own to finding him any services he may need....
My doodles while I talked to his transition coordinator yesterday...

This is the first full week of school for both of them.  Hoping this school year not only brings challenges and growth, but some pride and happiness too!

Saturday, September 09, 2017

Moment in time...

She lies beside me.  Dad has gotten up...she seems to have radar...replaces him beside me in bed.  I look at her, I hug her...and I look at her...her eyes shut, her lips parted just a bit, her hair framing her face.  I am trying to make a picture in my mind of this moment, this Willow...this little girl who I adore and love.  Right now.  This moment.  Before she grows another inch, another month, another day, another minute older.

Friday, September 01, 2017

Cape Cod 2017 and Summer Ending is September 1st.  The year has gone by a lot quicker than I expected it (and I expected it to go fast).  It seems like it was just the beginning of 2017 just a few months ago.  Just a few days ago, we were watching Michael Graduate....and a few more days he will be starting college classes....

Before then...a recap of our annual Cape Cod trip:

  • We stayed in an efficiency in Wellfleet - where Michael learned that he did not like cutting onions, after saying..."Well, I don't see what the big deal is...I am not crying..." then he tried to eat a piece of worked....

  • Technology meant that I could continue Binge watching "Switched at Birth" on my cellphone...and continue to receive text messages of condolences...

  • We did the Clambake at Silver Beach again...which was partially rained out, but we did get our sunset on the beach (and s'mores with a fire pit!)

  • We laughed at the Drive-In selections and watched Spider-man again...

  • We had pool time and beach time and even Goat time!

I am so glad to have gotten my curried scallops!

Immediately, she started singing to the snails.

Um...yeah, the Nut Job 2 is far superior...umm...yeah, no.


Cupcake Charlies - yum!!

Clambake - inside at first...well, at least good food!

Arnold's 40th year--deserved a coloring contest between us.  Mine is in the middle..Chewy is on left...Michael said his lobster was an albino lobster (we accepted, as long as he colored the other things nearby it...)

Willow was still working on her masterpiece when the food came.

Walking and petting goats.  

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These goats are being used on Cape Cod to help landscaping issues (they can eat all sorts of weeds and brush).

Mini Golf fish!

Growing up....

We finished off the summer activities with a BANG, with Tom coming up for a two week whirlwind visit.  We did the touristy things with him a...