Talkin' to myself and feeling old. Sometimes I'd like to quit; Nothing ever seems to fit; Hangin' around, nothing to do but frown; Rainy days and Mondays always get me down
What I've got they used to call the blues:
Nothin' is really wrong;
Feelin' like I don't belong;
Walkin' around, some kind of lonely clown;
Rainy days and Mondays always get me down.
-- Rainy Days and Mondays by Songwriters: Roger Nichols, Paul Williams
The end of summer started to bring it on. The fall usually would cheer me up but this year all I could think about was the coming winter and the ending summer. The holidays...well, they brought their own baggage, good and bad in its own nostalgic glory.
So here I am. Talking to myself and feeling old.
Feeling a bit isolated and timid about the new year. And sometimes I would like to quit.
I think I have the winter "blahs". Which is funny because we haven't had any snow yet. Or maybe that is the problem. The anticipation of the snow.
Like the anticipation of the job interview. Or the anticipation of changes, big and small in our world.
Just before Christmas I found out our longtime neighbors (they were here before we were) are finally moving (they have been talking about moving for years now). These are the neighbors who have boys around Michael's age. The kid who walks into our house unannounced...will not be anymore. The good news...well, they are not moving far away, just across town--so, one of my big concerns about Michael having this friend, is not so bad--just requires a bit more planning.
But, this comes at a time where we have been debating about our own move. Like them, we did not think we would be in this house as long as we have been. And now...well, now we feel like our hands have been forced to start the long process of evaluating our house, getting it ready to be sold, etc. (Doesn't help that they haven't actually sold their house yet...)
"This couldn't come at a worse time" is a phrase that pops into my head a lot these days.
So many changes and non-changes. So many things are up in the air right now. And I feel, well sometimes I feel...alone.
I guess that is why they call them the Blues.