Remembering Paul...

While Tom was up, we decided to go visit Paul's grave.  When he visited last time, we tried to visit his grave and could not find it.  This time, one of us had found it earlier this year...and we somberly visited.

Tom had a great idea to leave a die 20.  And then we were done.

It is very strange how death comes, we mourn, we grieve and then life goes on.  We remember the dead, we don't ever really stop missing them.  But yet, life moves you along and the all consuming grieving gives way to just a small throbbing in your heart...a place you hold dear and sometimes take the time to reflect on.

“Eventually, all things merge into one, and a river runs through it. The river was cut by the world's great flood and runs over rocks from the basement of time. On some of the rocks are timeless raindrops. Under the rocks are the words, and some of the words are theirs. 
I am haunted by waters.” 
― Norman Maclean, A River Runs Through It and Other Stories

The flag is for his father, it is a family grave site.

The acorn was Willow's idea.

By the time I took these pictures, Willow was starting to just play around...I like the juxtaposition of life and death and reverence and irreverence here.

Summer Ending with a Bang!

Willow has finally started to settle into camp.  Yesterday, their field trip was to Canobie Lake Park…and the Adventure!Willow I know and love came out.  She explained all the rides she went on, how she went in a helicopter ride, went on one of the water roller coasters and got totally drenched.  She was beaming and excited, she was so blissfully, utterly a child.  I wish I had been able to see her doing this (but isn’t that the bummer part of being a parent, you often don’t get to see how your children shine with other people/groups).  Next week is her last week of camp—they are going to the Museum of Science for their last field trip…sort of a precursor to school, I suppose. 

Michael has LOVED video game creation camp.  He has been working on his own game, which is his homage to Universal Monsters—he has a Frankenstein’s monster, Dracula, wolves, etc.  From what I have seen, very clever  traps too.  He has mentioned more than once that he definitely wants to come back to this camp next year (we only did this one for a week to try it out).  To see him happy and smiling this summer has been such a wonderful thing. 

Tom is here!  With gifts and games, he already has put Willow to bed and started getting indoctrinated into the My Little Ponies fan base…and we are looking forward to a weekend of Dim Sum, Museum of Fine Arts and Blue Man Group!


Pictures from last weekends trip to Cape Cod:

Picture by Willow

Wellfleet Sanctuary

Fiddler crabs!

Looking for life

Fiddler crab on the hand!

Mini Golf at Red Barn!

Provincetown eating.

Having breakfast before going home.

Time Flux and Weary

We had a fun three day weekend on Cape Cod and enjoyed ourselves restfully.

Tom will be visiting for a little over a week, starting this Thursday, so we feel the summer lingering…and yet…

Fall is creeping in.  Bought Willow a backpack while on the Cape.  We drove past her school on the way out for dinner last night, to see if they had posted what class she would be in (they had not).   When we got back from dinner…I looked at her supply list and sorted out the stuff we have already with the things we need to buy.  Bought Michael another backpack online, along with most of the other stuff we needed.

The news is making me weary.  There is this, and this, and this.  I cannot shake these out of my head at times.

Yet last night at dinner, I was watching my son while he talked with his father.  Watching his hand on the table while he leaned on his elbow…that brought tears to my eyes.  He is beautiful and wonderful and I helped create that. 

Time is in flux and I find that I am being moved along with it and sometimes I am happy for just the chance to watch it unfold.

Perfect Moments

She lays next to me.  We snuggle and say nothing for a long time.  She has been anxious lately, discovering how life works, how death happens and how time moves on.  She tells me that she will never grow up.  I smile with wet eyes as I tell her how much I don't want her to never grow up....that the whole point of having children is to watch them grow, the adventure and all.  I am a convincing liar, just this once, as in my heart I wish she could stay this way forever.

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He is smiling.  Actually smiling.  He has perfected the sullen teenager act so much lately that I am surprised by his light mood.  We talk and I discover my son over and over again, how much he has grown, how much he is still my little boy.

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He seriously asks me to come downstairs.  Last night we discussed how anxiety-ridden the last few weeks have been, how melancholy has crept in, how the stupid car needs to be repaired before he gets yet another ticket from a very bored and very persistent town police.  So, I assume the worst this morning.  And he surprises me.  He has spent the early morning making personal "business" cards for our Aspy son so that on his last day of camp he can try to keep the tentative friendships going.  He even put his camp nickname and his internet board icon on the paper cards.

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Every morning.  One of them jumps on top of me, purring and purring.  Not a bad way to wake up.

Cell Phone Picture Summer...

Someone told me today that August is the "Sunday of summer".  I guess August 1st is like the Sunday morning of summer.  It is still summer here, still plenty more fun things to do, camp is still in full swing...but yes, Back to School Sales are starting...and the hints of summer soon coming to an end.

I just can't believe July is over.  It went by so quickly!

Michael has been enjoying his LARP camp, however it is obvious that he is getting too old to just be a camper anymore....we may explore him being a "monster camper" (i.e. teen counselor/NPC) next year.  He has one more week of LARP camp (if you click the link, there is an article about the camp, Michael (barely) is in one of the pictures (I can see the tip of his head and his eyes!).   Later he will have video game creation camp (a new adventure that I hope he enjoys and he behaves well for).

Willow seems to have anxiety and separation anxiety issues dealing with summer camp.  I think the camp may just be too big for her...it is definitely a bit more chaotic than she is used to.  Her behavior in camp has been a bit more troublesome than usual for her and then she ended up being out a few days, so I hope that she finally settles into a routine at camp this last month.

Speaking of being out of camp...this week, Willow pulled her right leg muscle/groin muscle.  She was in a pretty good deal of pain, and for three days she could barely walk.  Luckily, she seems to be pretty well healed...and went back to camp in time for the field trip (which was fortunately to a movie theater!)

We are keeping the wind down of summer at bay with trips to the beach and birthday parties, hopes for our friend Tom to visit and some other fun summer time activities!

And now, for some random cell phone pictures!

With her neighbor/best friend Jessica.  Almost got earrings...she has been asking and asking for them, and then got to scared too get them.  Instead they got best friend lockets.

Dad and Willow...Johnny Rockets hats.

Chuck E. Cheese is responsible for the many many hair extensions in the house.

This Tuesday's adventure to the hospital to check out if there was a fracture in the hip, or "just" a groin pull/muscle pull.

Getting an X-Ray...no fractures!