Tuesday, September 01, 2015

#MicroblogMonday (Tuesday): What is it like

To see other #MicroblogMonday Posts, click HERE.

What is it like?  I wonder and hope that I understand him.

I know what it is like to be a teenager

Out of control/In control

Knowing all and being smug

Knowing nothing and being scared

But his mind

I do not know what I think I know

He "doesn't know" either

Last night, frustration over a small thing

Erupts into a small (for him)

Big (for others) Tantrum

How does this work?

This Asperger thing?

Why and how and where

I clean up part of the mess (new carpet!)

He storms downstairs, still not calm

I talk calm but firm

(He will have to clean up the rest of the mess)

The mess that was a cause/consequence of his frustrations

He goes upstairs to his room again

Glaring is something he does well


Calm and cleaning up

This is my son

I worry about him

I know he will be fine

This smart/sad/frustrated/anxiety-bomb of a teenager

This wonderfully funny/frustrating/child of mine.

What will he be like in five years?

(I don't know)


Monday, August 24, 2015

#MicroblogMonday: Clinging to Summer...

Not sure what #MicroblogMondays is? Read the inaugural post which explains the idea and how you can participate too.  Check out the current #MicroblogMonday posts HERE.

Well, there is no more denying it...the end of summer is upon us.  I have gotten most of Willow's school supplies and need to go through her clothing for the inevitable back to school updates/additions.

Last week I got Michael's "materials list" -- you become a junior in high school and the school supply list gets a new name!  (Oh, and we got his accommodations letter for PSATs and SATs...sigh...)

But...this weekend, we spent time enjoying summer...because it is still summer yet, damn it!!

We went to Cape Cod for a long weekend and it was so relaxing and fun.  We stayed here.  We were very impressed and hope to stay there again next year.  It was right on top of some of our favorite things, so we enjoyed beach time and pool time and some wonderful food too!

The weather was a bit gray at times, but it was perfect for us and we were able to get our little list of favorite things done in our three day mini-vacation!

Friday evening--time for a well deserved MudSlide!

This was very yummy--curried scallops!
That evening--beach preview.

Michael used his arcade tickets well!

Father and son walk on the beach--dad is carrying rocks that Willow found along the walk...she is in the distance...still gathering rocks and stones.

Some rocks that did not make the cut...
still looking for pretty stones, shells
Mini-golf on Sunday

Lots of lobster was eaten.  With Dignity...always Dignity!

The motel had a nice play set and an outdoor pool!

Not all food we craved was seafood!  Yum!

Until next year!!


Wednesday, August 05, 2015

Feeling Limbo-ish

Waiting for the other shoe to drop...

Stuck in Limbo...

Not sure the next steps...

I spent the weekend in a funk, especially Sunday.  Monday was 20 years since Chewy's dad passed away unexpectedly.  20 years since my Grammie almost came to visit me in my new life, before she had the first of many strokes.

Twenty years and so much has changed, yet stayed the same.  Sometimes I just feel alone...and the losses make me feel even more alone.  Sometimes I feel like I am so overwhelmed and I wish I had someone to carry the burden...and then I realize that the someone who is carrying the burden for others...is me.

Sometimes we just need to catch a break.  Sometimes we do not.  Sometimes we do and we don't know it.

The roller coaster of life...I sometimes love it.  And sometimes I want to get off of it.

(I wonder if I need to be medicated; then I tell myself I do not)

Maybe its seasonal or generational.  I definitely can tell I am having "feeling old" moments, and yet I am young.

I am out of shape, but I am working on getting back my exercise routine.  I am happy but weary.

Things are good...but not great...things could be getting worse.

We have our health (for now, I think)  

We have each other.

The summer is spinning out of control and most of the things I love to do I have not done yet.  (Really, do I have to have a list, must things always be the same/different?)

Well, you know what...there is always time (until there isn't)...

I want to read more, but there seems to be no time...its almost a year since Robin Williams died...is everything going to be all right...why are there so many Republican candidates...why is Elizabeth Warren not running...maybe she will...where is my license plate that I ordered...I am so sick of packing lunches for summer camp.

You know what--she is back in from playing outside.  Her cheeks are red and she is happy and she makes me forget my fears and worries.  There is just now with my little girl...

and it is enough.


Tuesday, July 28, 2015

Weird Summer

Having vacation right at the start of summer already makes for a strange summer, especially since part of summer is anticipation...but this summer just has been all kinds of weird...

Michael is going to school, as his school is year round.  He has a summer elective and they get 1/2 days on Friday, but it still means that his morning routine is the same.  Which means our routine is the same, really.  He is not the only one eagerly awaiting his two weeks vacation at the end of August!

Willow has been to two different summer camps.

The first one ended last week...it was more of a "Tiger Mom" type camp, where the kids had workshops and classes throughout the day.  Last Friday was Family Day and we got to see what she had been doing for the last 3 weeks.  She had explored science and things that fly...and been part of an actors studio and dance.  For the acting--the kids put on a play.  In the auditorium of the middle school where the camp was held.  On the stage, my bubbly little girl became the shy,stage-frighty girl...she ran crying from the stage.  We comforted her and told her all the actors who have stage-fright, etc.  She ended up going up on stage with the rest of the class and taking her bow.  The bubbly-girl came back in the dance class---she put on her "costume" (they had tie dyed shirts earlier in the class curriculum) and she twisted and twirled and smiled.

For the rest of the summer, Willow will be going to a more "traditional" camp--swimming, field trips, running, jumping, crafts, etc.  Already I can see this is more her speed.  (Monday, her first day, they went on a hike in the woods, ate their lunches and she met a new friend and they found a tree who spoke to them in a tree language that they made up)

Chewy is working from home, which makes it weird too.

Add in our "normal" mix of anxieties from Aspergers/Teen issues, work issues, home and car repair...it just makes for a strange time.

Not to mention, of course, the fact that I cannot wrap my head around the fact that more than 1/2 of this year is over...that my son is almost 16 1/2, my daughter will be in second grade in September...

I need more beach time!  [sigh]


Sunday, July 05, 2015

Cape Cod 2015

It wasn't perfect (weather was tricky the first couple of days, almost got killed on the highway when my trunk opened unexpectedly, our first hotel room was impossible for us to stay in, teen angst, etc...)...but our vacation on Cape Cod did indeed pick up and there were some wonderful highlights...

as usual, it was over too fast--and on top of it all, add an unusual July 4th and Chewy's birthday today (July 5th) and Chewy's mother leaving to go back to Michigan after her visiting...we are a bit bittersweet feeling today.

But, we have our memories to look back on!

On a beach in Hyannis--waiting for the weather to be better!

Cape Cod National Seashore Visitors Center.

At Red Barn Pizza in Eastham.

Beach time in Eastham!

Looking at art in Provincetown!

Hanging out with Nonnie in Provincetown.

Finding snails, shrimp and hermit crabs in Provincetown.

Singing to a snail.

Highfield Hall in Falmouth had Fairy Houses!

This fairy house in a tree and has little lobster traps!

Willow looking picture perfect.

Willow and Nonnie looking at a fairy house.



Wednesday, June 24, 2015

Rite of Passage - Stitches!

Willow had a bit of an adventure late afternoon yesterday.  She was playing with a child in her after-school program and was being swung around--and fell to the the floor hard.  On her chin.  With a big gash.

I left work early, expecting to see just a small cut--but...emergency room, three hours and SEVEN Stitches later we were home!

She was a brave girl and now she has survived another Rite of Passage!

Pictures below:

Waiting for the Doctor.

This one is a bit gruesome  (if you want to skip over it, there are more nice pictures):


The results:

Seven stitches for the Seven Year Old!

Good Job, Willow!

Strawberry Popsicle Reward

Glad it was not too serious and proud of my little girl!


Monday, June 08, 2015

#MicroblogMonday - Camping!

Not sure what #MicroblogMondays is?Read the inaugural post which explains the idea and how you can participate too.  Click here for the latest #MicroblogMonday


I took Willow for her first ever camping trip...me and her in a tent, our friend in her camper.  There were campfires, s'mores, late nights, visitors and a little rain.  There was running around playing with dogs, hot dogs on the fire, fishing and watermelon, strawberries, bagels and ice cream.  (All while camping in our friend's woodsy, rural, wonderful backyard)

First Night, S'mores and visitors!

First Morning after spending the night in the tent!

The "Campsite" (another camper came the next night)

Fishing for the first time!

Fascinated by fish